Martha and Mary

I've heard the story many many times. Today I was consumed with the story. I placed myself as Mary and Martha.

As Martha: I was preparing dinner while Jesus sat in my living room. I was frustrated with Mary because she was sitting on her behind not helping or even offering to lend a hand. I began to become more and more angry slamming pots around and making all kinds of racket. I kept shooting angry glares towards Mary but she never took her gaze from Jesus. Wouldn't she want Him to have the perfect meal? Why wouldn't she help me? Surely Jesus will tell her she needs to help me. Let me go ask Him...

As Mary: I knew my sister was upset with me as the pots began to chime, ding and dong louder and louder, but I didn't care; I was with Jesus. I was sitting at His feet listening to His parables in His soothing voice and occasionally hearing His soft laughter. Why would anyone want to be doing anything other than listening to Jesus? No body should! I knew I was about to get it when Martha walked up...

As Martha: I stormed over to Jesus with hate in my eyes, heart and soul. Martha gets to enjoy Jesus while I slave away. 'This is going to change' I thought. I proceeded to question Jesus instead of my sister due to the fact she was already ignoring me. I spoke my [bitter] heart "Lord, doesn't it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work?" Then I demanded "tell her to come and help me!"(Luke 11:40). Ha. That's it I embarrassed her in front of Jesus. Serves her right.

As Mary: I knew it was about to get ugly when Martha interrupted Jesus during one of His stories. She proceeded with a overly hateful question as a stab to me. As she finished her question a slight smirk appeared upon her face followed by a dumbfounded look when Jesus replied "My Dear Martha, you are worried about all the details! There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her" (vs. 42).

As Martha: After hearing Jesus speak I remembered to whom I was speaking to. I stepped back when I realized I had belittled the Lord. I was worried about getting thing completed. I didn't want to be seen as I saw my sister, lazy. It was me who was wrong. Jesus could have prepared dinner in the blink of His eye, but I forgot that. I truly was worried about the small things. I wasn't concerned with the fact JESUS WAS IN MY LIVING ROOM. I was worried about how things would turn out, but that shouldn't matter because Jesus would make them turn out perfect!

As Lindsey: I have been so distracted with the details. I have been having my quiet times to a God who is in heaven but not to and with one who is in the same room as me. I have been caught up in ME getting the details right but Jesus can perfect the details when I hand them over to Him. Jesus is perfect I am not in any way. I am a Martha. One is wanting things to go perfectly but unwilling to sit and listen to what Jesus wants to say to me because too many things would be left unfinished. I need to become Mary. One who listens and leaves the details up to Jesus. He will let them fall into place.

Summer Job

Yesterday we dropped Joshua off at the airport. He is going to be gone for two months without much communication. There will be some, but I don't know how often that will come. I am sad, but I am glad because I know the LORD will use him as a vessel.

Tomorrow I begin my summer job working as a youth intern at a church. I kick off my first day... week with VBS. I'm a going to hit the ground running. I cannot wait to see what the LORD does this summer in this town. I can feel the LORD already brewing something up.

Being BOLD for Jesus.

Lately the LORD has been showing me that He wants me to be bold(...like He has to show any of us that.. we should already know). Over and over again I hear "BE BOLD FOR THE GOSPEL AND THE SAKE OF JESUS CHRIST". I always feel convicted because I am not being bold for His sake. Here is when my passion started..

Last weekend at a d-now I was sitting, watching and listening to the voices singing praises to the LORD. I realized.. that's what I do most of my life.. sit and listen. He speaker had said earlier: "don't just sit and soak in Jesus, you can't hold Him to yourself. You need to be spreading what He showed you in your time with Him. Procalim His name!". When I was sitting I was asking the LORD what I was doing on an everyday basis for Him... I found exactly what I was doing... nothing. The this wonderful idea just happend to pop in my head... what if I simply wrote verses and handed them out to random people I don't know and told them about Jesus and prayed with them if they would allow me to. (We have handed out verses at the past two d-nows I've been to. Why do I only wait for weekends like that or specific 'mission' projects that someone else has planned? Or only with my friends, who are Christians, but now proclaiming the gospel to someone who might have never heard it before- this is what we are called to do).

SIMPLE.

That is exactly what I want to do. Go to places.. where ever I am.. Marshall, home, Dallas. To whoever needs to hear the words of the LORD.

I didn't do anything about it expect think 'how cool would that be?'... thinking about it is NOT nearly enough.

I read Isaiah 11:6-9 the other day. It talks about how we will all live in harmony together on day. For example: lions and lambs hanging out together and cobras and infants playing together. ENEMIES. Things that shouldn't be together are best friends! Verse 9 says "Nothing will hurt or destroy in all My holy mountain...the earth will be filled with people who know the LORD". Basically everyone lives in harmony because everyone knows the LORD. Imagine how much we could transform this world if we, as Christians, told people about Jesus! I know people, when they truly find Jesus will be a peace inside, but hopefully also if they are violent- physically or with their words-they will be at peace when they find Jesus. Imagine how drastically our world would change if people knew the LORD. What are we doing as Christian? What am I doing? I want people to live like one day we will in heaven. Peaceful and worshipful.

MY LIFE NEEDS TO BE A MISSION FOR CHRIST!
I'm working on it :)

Linds

The Butterfly Circus

This was a very powerful video we watched for spiritual renewal week last night during release:

Original:
http://www.thedoorpost.com/hope/The Butterfly Circus/


Part one:


Part 2:



Let this settle before you read what I have to say about it


Let God speak to you and listen to what He has to say



Things I learned from this video:

A butterfly has to struggle on their own to gain their strength to fly. You cannot force someone to be a christian because they will never have strength to fly on their own. You have to let people learn on their own and struggle to find their strength.

Before you come to the Lord you are one thing but something different happens with your life (you get all wrapped up in something different and try to figure out what it is). Then you are a new creation and you learn to fly on your own and bring glory to God!!

There is so much to be learned from this video and God is using it in powerful ways :)

The Great Thing About Jesus

So often people die (or say they will die) for people they love or righteous people die for good and righteous people.

But Jesus, a righteous man, die for those who didn't love him (yet) and are not even close to being called righteous. He died for those who will and continually spit in his face and run from him. I can only imagine Him wiping the spit off His face and saying 'it's okay. I would do it over 927485 million time just for you because I LOVE YOU that much'.

Creation

When I woke up Monday I really did not want to do my devotional because I had a two quizzes and a test and it was over creation (this usually makes me excited but not that morning). Anyway I did my devotional. I read Job 38 which said "who kept the sea inside its boundaries as it burst from the womb", "who laid out the path for lightning", "was it you who carved the canyons" and just mind blowing stuff. YOU SHOULD READ IT! Anyway I just remember how cool I though God was and again he humbled me by showing me how great He is.

So, what should happen when I get in chapel? We have a speaker who basically quotes the creation story and has BEAUTIFUL pictures of all the things God has created. Then what does the speaker quote... JOB 38! Please see how real the Lord is!

I was just so amazed by what happened and I was so joyful. I realized that the Lord is going to bless me even when it is something I don't want to do but He desires me to do. The Lord has been telling me that when I walk on HIS path it is so much better than what direction I would walk.

Later in the day, I was talking about it and then I realized it was my birthday and all day the Lord was showing me His creation. Then I realized, something I have known but was reemphasized, 'when you talk about Me I will fill you with joy, and when you talk about what I have shown you and have done you will get more out if it from other people because I communicate through them as well'.

Joy Filled

So lately, like since Thursday, I have been so joyful in the morning and something happens in the day and I get robbed of my joy. Seriously!! Sunday we talked a little in church about letting the devil rob us of our joy. DING DING DING DING: ephiphany: the devil is the one who has been taking my joy away... that little poop head... Today I prayed that God didn't let my joy get robbed from me. I had a wonderful day a little thing happened but it wasn't enought to rob me of my joy. Then at work... that's is when it happened. (Don't get me wrong I LOVE going to work! Sometimes it is challenging but so rewarding.) James, the down syndrome boy I attend to, did not want to cooperate. He just kept saying "no"... "no". So I was really tring to do puzzles with him and it was so hard because he did not want to be doing that and I just got fusturated and sad because I couldn't help him or really understand him. Getting him to go to dinner and then a bath and brushing his teeth and eyedrops were a NIGHTMARE! Needless to say it was just fit after fit, so I was just getting bogged down and robbed of my joy. Then when I was laying on his pillow putting him to bed I was just thinking how lucky I was to be working with him because even through all of this he would come and give me a hug or just look at me and laugh and it just filled me with so much joy!! So by the time I got in the car I was so JOYFUL!! But the devil didn't stop working... he let me see something I didn't want to while driving back to school. Then the the switchfoot song Gone came on. You know "gone, like yesterday is gone. tomorrow is too late.
** Here is where God gets even more awesome!! **
The Lord has laid this verse on my heart for a while now and it is 1 Chronicles 29:15 "our days on earth are like a passing shadow, gone so soon without a trace" but He also laid Psalm 9:1 "I will praise you LORD with all of my heart; I will tell of all the marvelous things you have done". For me it was like the LORD was telling me that I am blessed with a new day to tell of all the marvelous things he has done, not only to my christian friends but to nonchristians because the day will soon be gone and that opportunity will soon pass. SLAP IN THE FACE! Anyway then that song came on and just brought me so much joy! Then I was so excited to run back and tell my roommates but NONE of them were in the room and I feel like I was robbed of my joy AGAIN!! Then God just kind of revealed how awesome and in control and how he delights in every detail of my life (psalm 37:23) and it just made me joyful again.

To say the least even though at points in my day the devil robbed me of my joy the LORD refilled my joy and punched the devil in the face for me and it was awesome!!

Ps. This might be confusing but I wanted to tell the world how awesome He is and how His hand is at work in my life!

Pss. I wish I had time to say all the little things that the LORD is doing in my life but I just don't have that kind of time!! He has done SO MUCH!!

The Bible

For the past couple of days, maybe even weeks I feel like I don't have the same connection with God like I have had in the past. Not that I feel disconnected or even stagnant; I just feel like I haven't been growing like I should even though I have been doing my devotionals in the morning and praying. For one, I feel like I have been selfish in my prayer like praying a lot about myself.
Which isn't a bad thing but I feel like I should be less selfish in my ways and pray about others more than myself. Lately, I have felt like God has been so distant like a god I don't even know even though I see the great things He has done in my life and the conversations (and movies) he has spoke to me through.

Today I picked back up a book that I haven't touched since the beginning of summer called Searching For God Knows What by Donald Miller. Chapter 4 really talks about the Bible. Miller talks about how us Christians see the Bible as a self help book rather than a love story or beautiful. He also talks about how modern Christians like to make list. We like to have steps for example: 1) Start going to church 2) Learn who Jesus is 3) Accept Jesus as your Lord and Savior 4) Get baptised. We like to have thing broken down for us so we can say we checked off another thing on our list. Miller even says that "[he] grew up believing Christians didn't have to love God or anyone else; he just had to believe some things and be willing to take a stand for the things he believed." That breaks my heart that the gospel was presented that way, like a ticket into heaven will be enough. What's even more sad is that some Christians know that acting that way isn't enough but they still will not change the way they act or live.

I realized the other day that the Bible is kind of hard to read because it is written in a way that our books are not written. Books are written in list or sequential form, and the Bible is not written like that at all. Well, the Bible sort of is, but it is written in a more poetic fashion. Miller says that "poetry is a literary tool that has the power to give a person the feeling he isn't alone in those emotions, that. though there are no words to describe them, somebody understands." Going back to list, Miller gives the example if you make a list of all the great things about your girlfriend and recite it over a candle light dinner it is not going to be as romantic as if you would write her a poem describing the way she is rather than just listing. That's the way God acts. Miller says as Christians we like to break things up so it can be easy to understand but if we break things up too much we lose the meaning. Miller, "list might [be] accurate, [but] it certainly [are not as] meaningful."

God is wrote a love story for us and we try to break it down to the basics and turn it into list. Miller says "the separation of truth from meaning is a dangerous game." My favorite quote Miller says is "perhaps if we stop reducing the text to formulas (lists) for personal growth, we can read it as stories of imperfect humans having relations with a perfect God and come to understand the obvious message He is communicating to mankind."

We cannot break down the bible into list of how we should live because the meaning of the message is lost when we do because the message become simpler and that doesn't make an "impact on the way we live our lives of think about God."

What I have learned (although I already knew) is that God wants that personal relationship with us, but we water down what He has to say to us and when we do that we lose the love story, the poetic parts of His word just so it can be made simpler to us and faster for us to understand.

Life Gets Crazy...

WOW! Summer has gone by so fast so far. I just got back from church camp and it was AMAZING, but before I talk about that I want to update you on what has been happening in my life.

Well, I guess the only thing important that happened was Josh and I became certified scuba divers!! It was so much fun and I cannot wait to go diving in the ocean... as long as I don't see animals bigger than me. PS. We wen down 55 feet and it was dark and cold!

Camp. I've been so busy since I last blogged because we have been preparing for camp. We had to make TONS of videos, plan stuff, pack stuff and yadda yadda (so I, as well as Josh, were at the church in the morning until the afternoon and then running to scuba class or working on the online stuff for scuba), but it was totally worth it. Camp was so good. It was weird being on the other side of things and at times I felt totally unconnected with the students and adults because we were doing so much behind the scenes stuff. I did get to have some really good conversations with some girls at camp and I cannot wait to grow closer to those girls and everyone at the church. Even though camp was tough at times (Josh and I fought one day because he wasn't listening to me and I was getting a little stressed because Josh Herweck went to the emergency room... but that is another story) it was very encouraging. Herweck told me one night that he could tell that I was supposed to be here at camp and a few people told me that they could tell I changed from last year to now. Not that I am trying to brag on myself because I didn't change for myself I changed for the Lord. It was just encouraging to know that I am truly changing even though I cannot see it day to day it is noticeable.

I could go on and on but I want to update you on a few upcoming events.
This Wednesday I am speaking at church. Like instead of Herweck speaking I am... Yeah pray for me that I have the words to say, my nerves get calmed, and people will listen and understand what I am trying to get across.
I also have VBS and possible going on the college mission trip at the end of June.
I'm going on a mission trip to Seattle Washington July 10th-17th.
And also pray for me because y'all know I like to plan and I already planned out my schedule from next semester until graduation and this summer I planned to take World Lit online so I signed up for summer I but I had to withdraw because camp interfered. Now I need to take it in summer II but mission trip is going to interfere. Yeah, so it's not a big deal now, but if I don't take it this summer I am going to be stuck with taking 3 English classes one semester (and y'all know how I stress) and it is going to throw off my graduation schedule I already planned! I know I'm just a worry wart and God will work it out.

I miss you guys so much and hope y'all are all doing wonderful as well!!

Locks of Love. Surgery. Speaking.

I ended up donating 13 and a half inches to locks of love. This is not the best picture but the only one I had.
Next, my surgery.

I thought pics might be fun to see!! :)

I had surgery yesterday because the doctors thought I might have endometriosis. I did not have it so thank EVERYONE for praying because if I would have had that it would be hard for me to have kids when I wanted them. If you want to know exactly what they did you can give me a call because I would rather not tell the whole entire world. :) The surgery went well and I'm moving around and I feel okay... not the best but it could be A LOT worse. Thank you again for your prayers. I love every single one of you.

Also! If you live close and would like to come hear me speak I am going to be speaking on June 16th at 7:00 at my church. It would give you an excuse to see me and you could probably stay a couple of days with me! Just let me know!

Summer Plans.

I KNOW y'all get tired of hearing from me but I have exciting news!

Many of you know that I wanted to go to Honduras this summer with ETBU and that fell through because not enough people were going and yadda yadda. Allan also said something about going to Haiti but I never heard back (I think that as well fell through). I wanted to get a job this summer but my parents just wanted me to 'relax'. Someone from Young Life (a nation wide FCA-ish organization) came to my aunts house and my aunt asked if they were low on employees at any of their camps. This man said yes in Florida and I needed to be there by June 4th. Since I am taking a scuba diving class we have our final, which is 4 dives in Lake Travis, the weekend after that. So that as well got ruled out. I want to serve God, so I wanted to go somewhere to do so. But God has been telling me that I need to serve at home in Mimosa (our church) because so many people are broken there. And this has been on my heart since Xtreme. I finally decided to stop searching for places to serve and I emailed Josh...

So here is the story...
I emailed Josh (our youth pastor) maybe a week ago telling him that I felt like God wanted me serving in the church maybe leading a Sunday school or something like that. But little did I know the day (or two days) before he had told the guy interns that they probably would not have a girl inter this summer (Laura, the usual girl intern just graduated so she isn't coming back). So put two and two together... Last night at church Josh asked me if I would like to be the intern. Honestly this thought crossed my mind but I don't know. I guess I just pushed it aside because Laura was such a WONDERFUL intern. I've been praying about it and I hope you guys have been too. This is where God wants me. Leading the youth. (uh.. let me just remind you I'm 5'1 and a half, less that 100 pounds, and only 18!!) YEAH!

I just want to say how great God is. The things I thought I wanted He shut the doors on, and I am so glad He did because I have a passion in my heart to talk about God and tell others what He is and has done in my life!

PS. I scheduled my haircut for Locks of Love on MONDAY!! :)

Hungry.

Today during my Beth Moore devotional she asked "How do you know when you are hungry? When you are thirsty?" and then "What do you usually do when you are hungry or thirsty?" My response duh... go get something. The things is when we hunger or thirst for God do we simply go get something or is it more of eh... I'll worry about it later or the best I'm too busy. Too busy for God? The one who knitted you together in your mothers womb along with the other 6,818,911,658 (actual number from U.S. Census Bureau) people on this world. The creator of love who is going to fill the empty spots in your heart and soul if I just let Him in? (I know I am VERY guilty too so it hits home for me).

Beth Moore asked another question and it is "does your soul ever manifest physical symptoms?" My answer: HELLO YESS!! Anyone who knows when I do not have my time with God I am a grouch! Then that made me think God is so real. He is making my physical body reflect on when I did not come to Him and I was hungry for Him.

Beth Moore also said "the more we've been satisfied by God's love, His Word, and His Presence, the more we will yearn for it." I had to think about this for a minute because when I have my quiet time and go on about my day, no matter how good the quiet time was, I put God away and I seldom have the feeling to run back to my room and grab my Bible and see what else He has to say. I HATE to admit that but it is so true, and something I am working hard to change (Insert PRAYER here PLEASE). She also says "on the other hand, we can spend so much time away from the LORD that we no longer feel hungry or thirsty." For so long I did not hunger for God. I only did when I wanted something and eventually, through my time or hardship, I started to see how great God was and how much He loved me and when I realized that I realized I was hungry and thirsty for Him. I do agree that when we do not spend time with the Lord we do not realize we are hungry. Just like I did not realize I was hungry when I did not spend time with Him. I realize I am in a bad mood, but I did not realize it was because I missed 'breakfast' with the one who created the world and created me.

Another thing that bothered me was the other night at Bible study we talked about Jeremiah 29:11 ("For I know the plans I have for you. They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and hope"). Yes, God wants to give us a great future and He has that set out for us, but so many times we just stop there. We stop when we hear God has great things planned. Verse 13 is the best part and the most important part. It says "If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me." We have to be looking and searching for God and following His path in order for us to fulfill His plans for us.

Sorry this is kind of scatter brained, I had a lot to say and not a lot of time to say it (Pearson has a baseball game), but I hope you got my point and where I have been at. I love you guys and MISS yall like CRAZY!!

This morning during my quiet time I was reading Breaking Free by Beth Moore. In her bible study she gave a check list (much like the one below) to determine if someones life would be glorifying to God. This really hit home with me and made me think that I have a lot of growing to do before I can say I live a "God-glorifying" life. I hope you can apply this to your life because it was a HUGE wake up call for me!! I know I am going to print out the questions and verses to remind me daily what it means to glorify God with my life and I encourage you to do the same! :)

When I do things do I think will God be glorified?
"Whether you eat or drink, do it for the glory of God" 1 Corinthians 10:31

Do I desire Gods glory over my own?
"I have no wish to glorify myself; God is going to Glorify me" John 8:50

When I serve others do I sincerely hope they will see God in Me?
"God has given each of us a gift from His great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve another. Did God give you the gift for speaking? Then speak as though God himself were speaking through you. Do you have the gift of helping others? Do it with all the strength and energy that God supplies you. Then you will bring glory to God through Jesus Christ. All glory and power to Him forever and ever." 1 Peter 4:10-11

Do I turn to God when I go through hardships and try to cooperate with Him so He can use the hardships for my good and for His glory?
"Do not be surprised at the fiery trials you are going through, as if something strange is happening to you. Instead, be very glad for these trials make you partners with Christ in His suffering, so that you will have the wonderful joy of seeing His glory when it is revealed to the world." 1 Peter 4:12-13

Do I believe I can accomplish or withstand things with the power of God?
"We now have this light shining in out hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves." 2 Corinthians 2:7

Jars.

Today we gave out the jars and the blogs to everyone!! I'm so excited to get this started!! :)

Departure...

So finals are coming up and that means that everyone will be splitting up for the summer and I WANT TO KEEP IN TOUCH WITH EVERYONE!! I am going to miss everyone so much. So.. what did I do? Me and Sarah Renfro decided to create blogs for everyone to read. My goal is to post at least once a week. I want to stay in touch with everyone I have grown close to! I also want to know what God is doing in everyones life!! :)